how's it goin' garn?

well, let's see....
today i went to cut some grass-which i love to do and it was raining. i then had a ittle couch time trying to see if i could think of one good reason to be living in vancouver-couldn't come up with one thing (friends excluded from this...) i then spilt some hot mole sauce on my hoodie-excellent, then got a call from the mac market where i was getting some stuff moved from one hard drive-my old one, to a new external hard drive...but they phoned to say that they couldn't do it because the old hard drive is fucked...so i have now lost both work files and personal files...lots of them-40 gigs worth. later in the day i went and met up with marcy as she's housesitting at the place i was considering buying up on fraser street...i think it's a bit too big of a project for me and would cost me far too much in both time and money to get it anywhere near where i'd need it to be...i'm bummed by this conclusion. i then went and played hockey with corie and the rest of the bombers and played the shits-which is becoming more the norm than the exception and i think, actually i know, i despise one of the guys on the team...and for no other reason thatn he just bothers me. like a fly in the ointment. i yelled at him tonight when he did something stupid-and i'm not taking it back. i think i may be far better suited to games that require no team play. if i could i would bow out of the bombers spring league but i have already paid my dues and we're short players so i'm kinda committed now-i guess....i will say this, i am certainly not an asset to the team by any means...i think my main problem is i have lost any real drive for or towards the game itself. i just don't care anymore and when things go poorly, like tonight, i hate it even more. hard getting old. hard when you suck at things you used to be good at. even harder knowing it's never gonna come back or get any better. it's a hard road up and an even longer one on the way down.

ok. have fun.

and good night.

g. xo