things that ...... says...

i have written on here before about the guy who started writing down things his father would say and then post them on tumblr and who now has a tv show pending based on these postings..well...a friend of mine has been doing the same thing, minus the tumblr postings and the tv show...here now is a selection of things his son says...(the names have been changed...)

........

1. On John F Kennedy:

"Wouldn't want to sit next to that guy wearing the wrong hat"

2. On Botticelli's "Birth of Venus":

"Dudes from the renaissance totally 'bated to that painting"

3. I read an alert from police that a known sex
offender was preying on 16-year old boys and that I should keep tabs on my kid’s internet use. I told bobby that I wasn't crazy but I wanted to see what he was doing online just in case I was missing something.

He said,

"Its OK dad. It was me but it’s all under control"


4. When being accused of having blinders on about his chosen course of action.

"It's not like I see its all going to be amazing and that there will be hundreds of little horses all around for all the children to ride"

5. e-mail from his ipod in the school library

"...The librarians just had an interesting ordeal. Apparently some other kid named bobby stole or has an overdue book and they are trying to find him. They asked a student in here if she knew the kid and she responded that she did not. The librarian went on to say, in almost a superhero voice, "that's a shame, we are just trying to solve another mystery here at the library" and as she says this the whole place turns to look at her and she turns her head and tilts it upward to gaze over yonder. I couldn't stop laughing and had to tell that to someone else."

6. "Some people hate shit because they're not good at it. I am not good at shit that I hate."

7. Younger brother says, "Close your eyes and hold out your hands"

bobby says kindly without hesitation, "sure and you close your eyes and stick out your tongue"

8. Hey bobby did you have a good time walking home with your brother tonight (from the rink).

At sufficient volume “yes”

…then muttered under his breath “…we robbed a corner store together”

9. I receive a digital meat thermometer for my birthday and as I open the wrapping bobby mutters, “hmm. There’s a thousand uses for that”

10. This morning I poured some cereal for jackson and bobby. They had just woken up and nobody was saying anything. I noticed the gruff silence and started with a quip like. "Hey guys. Its just us guys here this morning so lets talk about guy things"! Just trying to make them laugh. There was a small silence and then bobby quietly says in his low mumbly baritone.

"Sure Dad. Let's talk about poontang"