it's inevitable that when this day comes around my head gets filled with thoughts of the last year. it's bullshit and i know it. i never engage in the new year's eve parties, the dropping of the ball in times square-i could give a shit. i stayed home last night and watched some of season two of desperate housewives-i have become obsessed. it's like a few years ago when i watched four or five episodes a day during the xmas/new year season of the sopranos. i was home by five pm and that was it. done like dinner. and i only had one offer to go out so i figured i'd stay home-and i was happy i didn't have to say no to anyone so it's all good...i ate veggies burgers and drank iced tea...man, i know how to party.
as for my full head...last year was a wierd one and one i wouldn't trade for the world, just because it kinda makes everything else what it is-the good going with the bad etc. but it was marked along the way with events i'll never forget. this time last year i was sorting out a part of my life that was very important but that really didn't get resolved until much later. and now, is great. i think. i have found a certain amount of peace in the last year-which may seem hard to believe for some of you but i have. it's taken a long time but i think, maybe, i'm finally figuring out what makes me happy-not that i'm gonna find it or get it but, i have an idea.
it was an eventful year. to say the least. and to all those who were involved in it-thanks. the heartache, the turmoil, the crying, the yelling, the smiles, the traveling, the burritos, the burgers, the coffee, the easy wash, etc..all good stuff.
i have actually tried to write thsi a few times and it keeps getting off the rails. i think too much. i want to say too much sometimes and have to stop myself. while i don't mind telling all of you about the sorted details of my life and my heart, sometimes i do have to rein it in a little. some of the shit that went on last year was, um, shitty. i want somehow to make it better-my life-and not because it's a new year. i'm not one for resolutions, really, but i do know a few things i am going to do this year that i hope will make things a little better or easier. and none of them are earthshattering really. i need to work on my back-it's a bad one and needs constant care. i need to walk more. i am lazy and that's a fact. i am going to go back to skim milk. sure, i like the soy milk but for how much i really drink and use..and as for soy cheese, that'll take a bit of a backseat as well...i love it but...i don't need it. 2007 is going to be a latte-free year as well. i only drink regular/espresso coffee at home so why be mr. fancy when i go out? i am going to go to more films this year. working in film seemingly killed my love for films but i would like to try and rekindle that. i need to read more as well, i do read, but not enough. this year i would like to make a second trip to marfa, texas. just thinking out loud.
oh..so much more. but it'll have to wait. i guess i just wanna say thanks to those who have stuck it out with me last year and those who, may, this year as well. try and come by the house and see the hiltons, the new toys, try out the couch and chair-whatever. see you soon.
have fun this year.
garn xo
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