merry christmas...really, i mean it.

last night i came home from the movie and started writing a long piece about christmas as i saw it. that i wasn't really a grinch, the reasons i feel the way i do about christmas, the act of giving, presents, why i hate 'it', all of it...but then i looked back at what i had written and realized that it really didn't make a lot of sense to lay it all out there at this time of year. the reasons are many, some of which only really make sense to me, and really, why bother...? christmas makes me feel a certain way that i can't explain to anyone with the clarity i'd like to. i love to give gifts but have put that by the wayside opting instead to give more of my time and personal energy to people, when i can. but i try and do this throughout the year instead of just when the date on the calendar tells me to. i still give the odd small gift but it's not as it used to be. and i'm okay with that. i want to see friends - in small groups at a time, i want breakfast at the grove, i want dinner at issy's christmas day, and i usually have dinner at floyd's earlier in december. i want to be at home at night, christmas day, thinking about how lucky i am to have friends and family i can count on. maybe this is my thanksgiving. i love each and everyone of you.
so it is now that i'm ready for some turkey and cranberries, udder guys ice cream and the couch at issy's. ang and marcy will be in tow today out to tsawwassen and we'll meet katriena, gary and, of course, issy, out there. shauna is on a large ship somewhere out in waters off of mexico and it's now that i miss her the most. merry christmas baby.

ok. the grove is only a few hours away.

g. xo