more birthdays, less phone and jangus.

a big (day late) happy birthday to emilie who celebrated her's yesterday...shauna and i went over to her place last night and gave her a few hugs and ate a bunch if her food. sure, we took some food with us as well, but we mainly ate hers. other people made food or brought food - we ate that too. emilie is off to berlin in the next couple of weeks to do an artist's residency there. some schnitzel, some beer, some painting...sounds good.

to anyone who may have tried to phone me yesterday and couldn't get thriugh....i guess i was having some sort of iphone/fido problema...not so happy with old iphone yesterday, it better be better today. fucker.
i'm off to cut a few lawns with the garbs today- what a champ he is - and then, maybe, take a trip out to see issy. i have a battery thingy to drop off ut there and i may also get the big box to old cool t-shirts i have there and bring 'em home, wash 'em, and then give them away. to who? i dunno. maybe you.
speaking of shirts. there will be another run of lawn order gear in a couple of weeks. i have a few e.mails sitting around from people who want them and i'll be collecting cash for those....but if you want one of the highly coveted shirts, now's the time. or it could be a hoodie. whatever. shit, i'll make ya gonch.
ok.
have a great thursday.

g. xo

in a perfect world

love and relationships aside, let's talk about a perfect world. love and relationships are too complicated to discuss in a 'perfect world' get-up. awesome, sure, but not for here and now.

let's talk about this.

i was riding the bus out to issy's the other day and listening to music as i did so. and as if it, my ipod, new exactly what i needed to hear, at that moment, a freedy johnston song came on. it was a track from 'can you fly', one of the great american albums of the last twenty years. really. you don't have to be a freedy johnston fan to agree to this. it was an album that came at exactly the right moment for me. a time when i was struggling with a faith of sorts, with love, with work, with being no longer young-young, but becoming more of a man. i think. but what it means to be, that album, is not what this is about, this is about something else, something really, sad to say, kinda clique. why didn't freedy become a big deal? everyone should have heard 'can you fly'. but they didn't. i saw freedy open for uncle tupelo at the old cruel elephant on cordova street - steps from where i am right now, and it was amazing. which brings me to this perfect world...
in a perfect world....

freedy johnston would have sold a million copies of 'can you fly'
mark fidrych would have pitched for at least ten years and won a world series for the tigers.

ok...i interupt this to give you am update...i am not going to buy a place in the mantra...not like you were holding your breath but, you can stop wondering. i will keep on keepin' on in urineville.

ok...oh, now i've lost my focus..

nevermind.

g. xo

knowing when to say when...

when may be now, maybe. i don't know. a few years ago, well, actually, almost 12 years ago, when i was in a similar state of mind and place i decided to make a change. a change of location more specifically. i owned a place in kits and loved it, it was a pretty good place. it was the first place i ever bought but i knew that it was time to shake things up and move and my reasons were not entirely clear, to me at least, but i felt it. it seemed right. and in the end i really only looked a few places but decided on the place i am in now, the gastown loft-type thing deep in the heart of crack central.
now i have figured out a few things about myself since moving down here oh so many years ago. or, better put, i have learned what living down here has done to me over time. i think i was more free-wheelin' before my move down here, i have become more suspicious of people on the street, i have become a less tolerant of the 'bums' and pan handlers, guys i used to hand money to, i no longer do, or less than i used to. i think i am more stern. and i think, i suspect, it has a lot to do with the environment i have put myself in, i have no one to blame really, nope, it's just what goes on down here. the city has failed to 'fix' anything down here, they have ...oh fuck it, you know what goes on down here, it's no shocker. but that environment can't not fuck with you over time. it just does. it has to. and i've often wondered, out loud sometimes - even to myself - if i should get the fuck outta dodge. sure, it's getting better, or should with the opening of woodward's and the paris block - it should but really, the koret lofts haven't really helped much. not much.
ok...so what to do. i dunno.
today, after shauna and ang left me to go out to pitt meadows to visit shauna's sister and her mom - who is in town for a scant 24 hours, i went for a walk and ended-up looking at a new development down on fourth ave. very near my old apartment in kits - well, close enough. it's a place called Mantra - nice name....and really, it's fuckin' great. sure, it's different- regular height ceilings, a little smaller sq. footage, etc...but the overall feel is amazing. all new. a new thing. total change. and it can all be yours for....holy fuck! but that holy fuck may be the just the tonic. maybe. beautiful deep soaker tub, amazing kitchen, storage, den, etc....nice.
so what's a guy to do?
sure i can sell my place, i have a decent amount of equity, but, the mortgage i'd be paying each month to have my new tonic...steep, at least compared to what i have been paying for the last 11 plus years...i have been lucky over that time and my low mortgage payments have allowed me to have a fun, road trippin', art buyin' lifestyle. so, am i ready to have a little of that go away to make way for a new place to live? to get back to the west side of town? getting away from the junkies and dealers and such? i dunno. it may be not so much a decision as much as an escape plan and a way to mend and save my mental health. just maybe.
but in the end it just may be too much. too much money. and i look around here and it's not so bad really. really it's not. someone else would possibly, probably, love this place. and a part of me is scared that if i don't do it, i'll lose even more of myself, the good part of myself, that's been getting whittled away over the last 11 plus years.
so, that's that. my report.

more details as they come in.

g. xo

sandwiches and good looks

i don't have much of a report i have to say...things are moving along and i'm making it through but it's a tough go sometimes...
there are things i wanna say but i feel best keeping to myself, sometimes it all comes out wrong and then you can't take it back....better to hit the backspace button than to press send so to speak. i am trying to convince the garbs that he should come on a roadtrip with me to get an el presidente in los gatos and see the beach in santa cruz...plus maybe a baseball game or two...we'll see. i don't hold out much hope he'll come but i think you help celebrate the regaining of my driving license i'll head somewhere. maybe gerlach.
shauna and went for lunch yesterday at so.cial, a joint in gastown. they make a good sandwich there. you should go. that's it, you should go.
marcy hooked-up with shauna and i as well before she left town to go on a little roadtrip her own self. she has a week off and she, as she said, "needs to get outta town for five minutes.", so off she's gone with no real plan. good for her. we went for coffee and then she came by the house and i loaded her up with books and a battery charger fr her camera and away she went - after dropping me on granville island...
ok...that's it.

have a great saturday.

g. xo

good lookin' sandwich.

good lookin' outfit.

nice lookin' salad.

nice.

stuff...more fuckin' stuff.

a couple of items you really don't need at all...well, one you may need or at least want - i do...the other not so much.

this is fucked....
this is not...

g. xo

don bull gets new shoes...

...sort of.
last night the garbs and i, after cutting some lawns - a lot of lawns in the fuckin' hot africa like sun - went and met up with don bull for a little topanga action. don had been trying to get me there for a while now to buy me a birthday burrito and today was the day - i just brought a date, the garbs. and somehow, don bought him dinner as well...and the garbs was putting it back last night like, well, a man who had cut a fuckload of lawns in the hot sun. and drinking too. i kinda feel badly now that we ate like champs in don's dime...well, maybe bad isn't the work...maybe, really fucking good is better...i love don bull...thanks for dinner, nice work.
as much as i hate to admit it, because it's still a ways off, i have begun the 'give me back my fuckin' license' countdown...according to my calculations, i should be able to walk in there, the DMV, on the 31st (or the latest the first of sept.) and get the mug shot done and go for a drive. and i am gonna drive. all around, willlie nillie.
and happy birthday greetings go out to erin boniferro who turns 31 today...31! what the fuck? well, happy birthday sister...

ok. i need to get some shit done.
have a great friday.

g. xo

i've been cleaning out my closets a little lately. getting rid of t-shirts and stuff and cam across my favorite jeans. i had these jeans fixed, so to speak, by a guy over on fourth ave. at least five times and also mishi had a crack at them four times at least. i loved them. fit just right, felt good but, i finally let them go a couple days ago. sad really.

this fucktard again....

just in case it had slipped your mind at all...this guy still owes me money...sure, i'll never see it but, i love posting his picture. here he's telling his gal pal how he fucks over people for small amounts of cash....she laughs and laughs and then he gets her to pay for dinner. oh, in case you've forgotten, his name is laurie mercer.

have a great day...

g. xo

it's all gonna break

the blog. sometimes i just don't know what to do with it, about it, for it, for those of you who read it....none of it. it was and is a outlet for me to express my feelings, let you in on what i've been doing, up to, who i have been with and hanging out with, and sometimes, about love. and now heartache.
i have in the past let it all hang out when i have been in the state i am now, but this time, i'm not going to do that. it's not maturity, not anything of the sort, it's more about privacy and respect and just, for lack anything better, a time to tough it out. put on my big boy pants and get through it. i am still in love, very much so, it's just that the situation that finds me in love is changing. and i'm hoping for the best result possible.
in a few short weeks i will get my license back and with it a renewed sense of self and freedom and, well, i'm sure something else. there may be a need for a trip to once again re-visit the original el presidente...always good for the soul and heart.
i don't have much to report right now....it's all about laundry, keeping busy and making it through....

i love you all so much. i really do.

g. xo

monte clarke shells out

tonight, or last night i suppose, monte clarke invited a few of his pals out to his annual back alley party. now, i wouldn't know monte if he stood right in front of me but, i was there too...as was the lovely shauna....our main motivation was to support our man byron dauncey who was having a coming out party of sorts as monte had asked him to provide the art for the party as well as do the front window of monte's granville street gallery...pretty big pants stuff to be sure. and by all accounts byron did a great job....
it was a tad loud for the old set - me - and the free beer and wine flowed freely...so to speak. fellow bomber cam andrews was there representing bombers everywhere, as was the flower factory contingent of katherine coe and rosanne bennett. good times...
have fun...more as it develops.

g. xo

angela fama and marcy enjoy the big back alley show.

cam and larry get down.

rosanne gets ready to leave the alley and the factory...

hey mister where ya goin' with that mower?

yesterday as marcy and i were coming back from richmond, after taking care of the doglawn, i got a phone call from a guy in strathcona who's lawn i was to cut as well...due to the crappy weather and such i decided i'd do it this morning - because it was gonna be so much better today. don't get me wrong, i was the guy who said we needed some rain, and we did/do, but, lawn cutting when it's super wet, not so good...i had also told shauna that she could use the car today to do some work related activities...so....this morning, as it rained and rained, shauna dropped me off in strathcona, very near casa gelato but just up on union street, and went on her way...so there i was armed with a mower, bag, and a weed eater and away i went....and it was a bastard of a cut....a: very wet out and getting wetter, b: long grass - like perhaps 8 inches long and c: did i say it was raining out....? anyhow, away i went and surprisingly, it went ok....sure, i got very wet, and there's only so much you can do with a long wet lawn, but in the end, jay - my lawn order client - was super stoked getting his lawn cut on a rainy day....i have to admit i really like it when the people i do lawns for make a point of saying how great it looks or how happy they are with the job, makes it worthwhile, or more worthwhile.
so there i was...wet, and getting wetter and i had to meet with the propellor kids to make some drawings of the stuff i am getting made for the new headquarter store in richmond...so i loaded up my weed eater and such and walked over to there studio on hastings street, all the while looking like a guy who had just stolen a lawn mower and weed eater.
i threw my stuff in their dryer so it was all good...and away we went making drawings and getting shit done. thank god for them, them propellor kids. i think this stuff is going to look great, as soon as i find someone to actually make it...i have a meeting with a wood working shop just down from propellor on tuesday and am also gonna assemble some other quotes as well. i kinda like this co-designer/construction coordinator stuff....a different kind of pressure than i'm used to...a new sensation.
on y way home from propellor i was walking along columbia street and some dudes asked me if i wanted any nacho type chips. i said no as i thought they were selling bags they had stolen from some store - and i really didn't need any chips - and then one of them said, "we're out here giving them to the homeless"...hhhmmm....now i look homeless in my lawn cutting gear after cuting in the rain....nice.
i made my way down to the island to see mishi and garbs but shortly after getting there, and having some lunch, started feeling very sore and my back started acting up - not that it's actually stopped acting up at all really - and i decided to have a little lie down in the back of the pickle...then i'd had enough of that and headed home courtesy of shauna who was driving by on her way back from richmond....
i'm home now and it is here i shall stay unless we decide to go see the new hellboy flick or step brothers...

now you know the whole story.

have fun....

g. xo

tobe took these pics as i approached propellor this morning after cutting the long wet lawn.

don't mess with the big 4-0!

last night shauna's birthday action got moved from the third beach to our place because of the weather at its not being able to decide what it was going to do..so...there we were yesterday getting snacks ready, cleaning the house, primping, putting stuff in its place, etc...and by 5 pm, we were ready to rock.
we had a nice spread of food, some fine wines and such and just enough folks came over that there were still places to sit and not feel too crowded, and the food held-up until 1 a.m. when allison and heather finally packed it in...good times...
this morning i shook shauna out of her slumber and got her to drive me to do a few lawns....actually, we had planned it the day before and it worked out pretty well. i still have a couple more to do this afternoon but i'm giving shauna the rest of the day off and miss. marcy is gonna help me cut a couple more lawns.
ok...i have shit to do....

more later.

g. xo

mark and emilie make the gang sign 40 birthday greeting...



the garbs got himself a new shirt yesterday..actually two...

happy birthday shauna!

it's a milestone year for ms. shauna...that's the truth. 40...and i don't think she minds me telling ya so. she seems kind excited by it really. so happy birthday shauna....i hope it doesn't rain today, and if it does, it doesn't matter, we'll head indoors and celebrate inside...

i love you.

g. xo

say cheese

this came through the old e/mail mailslot a few minutes ago...

The VANCOUVER AUTO SHOW is a group exhibition based on the theme of the automobile. New works by Roy Arden, Alison Yip, Evan Lee, Chris Gergley, Adam Harrison, and Derek Root as well as vintage photographs by Thomas Barrows and Danny Lyon among others will be on exhibit. In conjunction with our exhibit, the MONTE CLARK GALLERY is pleased to present its annual PARKING LOT PARTY featuring work by Byron Dauncey, taking place Saturday August 2^nd at 8pm.

this is great....

...juvenile but great...

check it out.

g. xo

she was a coffee girl, we went for a ride in my plymouth to get a pepsi....

the long and short of it is...i'm still sore. maybe i'm a little better but then again, maybe not. i've had a couple acupuncture sessions - mystic bullshit so far - and some 'cupping'...more jingus from the far east i suspect...a back that looks like a hundred hickies all for one low low price. i've had two sessions at yaletown sport and spinal. i'm a little more convinced by that action. actual hands on action as opposed to someone sticking some needles in me, leaving me alone with my thoughts for twenty minutes while she eats a snack and then she takes the needles out and that'll be 75 bux please. i'm being flip...she's awesome and it's all very interesting but, i feel the same...or maybe a little worse after two sessions of being the pin cushion.
on tomorrow's agenda is a CAT scan, or CT scan. high tech medical xray imaging thingus at st. paul's where issy did her nurses training...pretty exciting. and i'm hoping it helps in some way...
the other night, saturday, shauna, devon and i headed over to deepest burnaby to al's place for a little summer party action. colleen, al's wife had some tasty snacks for us and in the back yard was al's kids trampoline...which devon and shauna discovered - as did al's pal jim discovered as well. and, at one point decided that he should be on the trampoline at the same time as devon...jim's in the 300lb club so...well, maybe you get the picture. devon got more than the picture....katherine and corie showed-up and katherine immediately took to the trampoline, corie took to the beer.and then he and shauna traded jabs...shauna's been doing some kickboxing at the gym.
we left al's and headed to a restaurant/bar place on main street where a couple of shauna's pals were - one was playing in a band and the other was just there hanging out....the band that was there was headed-up by a guy who was a little daniel johnson-like in his delivery. or like smog. or...songs of the everyday. "i woke up this morning/i had a piece of toast/it had butter/ she called and then i left" or "coffee shop girl/you're the one for me/let's take a ride/see what we see" like that. there's room for that for a few songs, and then....
ok..
today mishi and i took turns helping each other out. she needed to go to north van. and i needed a ride to a couple lawns..so, away we went. off to capilano rock and gem first - home of all things stone and gem like and other jewelry related items...it's right across from a lawn place i like so....and then we went and chopped a couple lawns - mishi watched...can't blame her really. then off to liberty for some snacks...mishi grew-up on liberty bakery except it was called elsie's when it was in kits..long story. thanks mishi for the help. and the snack.
ok...that's that.
i forget anything else that may have happened....

below are some pics from the last few days....enjoy.

g. xo

this guy....

corie and shauna fight it out...



als' loves the edging job is gave his lawn.

al's big sushi.

she's a coffee girl.

mishi rocks out.

more jingus, less jangus

photo by the garbs

issy sent me a note yesterday and in it she used the word jingus...i love it. just one day after giving her the rundown on the usage of the word - if it is a word at all. it is to me.
not much to report really...
i went for some acupuncture yesterday and, although i didn't know about this, some cupping as well. that was a treat. i have to say i don't feel much different today but i'm hoping tomorrow may and will be different....i have an appointment for more pins and cupping so maybe, just maybe, it'll actually do something this time.
the garbs and i cut a little grass today. a lot of our/my lawns need some love in the way of rain so some didn't need a cut at all...so come on rain. just a little, don't freak out.
so tonight at the house was pretty exciting...a little traction, some neck exercises, some omelete action, more neck exercises, letterman and csi...man, i rock. but really, i kinda like it that way.
ok...sleep soon. i'm gonna get up early and do something. not sure what, but something.

g. xo

rock show, rock on, show sale....

i was the bus master today taking no less than seven buses. and i have to say, and i have said this before, i don't hate the bus, i hate the bus when you have to transfer. and the fact that you never actually get where you're going - close maybe, but not really there. anyhow...i gave it a go today, as i have been for the last 48 days or so.
i had to go over to fraser street to look at a lawn that may become part of the trap line for lawn order. after i had a look-see i made my way over to see the kids at voltage and see what's what. on my way over, walking down 28th i saw a table near a fence with rocks in a bowl or dish. and as i got closer i saw that they were for sale. and why not? and if i wanted to buy one i was to put the money through the fence. i don't need a rock but maybe you do, and if ya do, 28th ave is for you between main and fraser. go girl.



i then, after a couple more buses, hoped the south delta 601 and went and saw issy. i thought it would be fun to have lunch with her - it was - and pick-up the sunglasses she had picked-up for me in point bob.
one of the pairs of glasses is so bad - the color of the frames (the brand is primo...) - that i may have to sell them back on ebay. they're brand new and i'm sure someone will/would love them...

issy was wowed by the new iphone (oh, i just got one..), especially with the photos on it and the fact i could take her picture with it and then make it big and small and back again...issy also asked me to explain the meaning of 'jingus', and now that i have i think she's gonna use it...go issy!
i then hustled back into town to try and get to 2nd city signs to pick-up a piece of cut vinyl i was having made for the topanga but when i got there they were having troubles with their cutter and it reading my file so...i went away empty handed but it wasn't a fruitless task as marcy had called and had decided to come and get me....so marcy gave me a ride home, dropped some gossip on me and we had a nice visit...
and so it was, my day. tomorrow is acupuncture at glow in yaletown - i know k-win....it was like a sign for above. i'm still gonna to your gal on burrard as well....i'm trying everyone...

good times...

g. xo

file under: what the fuck?

this is the injector knife.
really....what the fuck?


good lord.

g. xo

we went to vera's and met vera...

...not that vera.
so there we were, last night, having dinner at vera's after dropping off stella when i noticed a woman getting, or trying to get, directions from a guy next to us...she was clearly lost and the guy, bless his heart, was a little confused and really, just wanted to get his burger and go...which he did...so i stepped in and after writing down the directions to the airport (which wasn't really where she wanted to go really...) it became even more clear that if i (and really if 'we' since shauna was now being implicated in this) really wanted to help we'd take her there ourselves...sort of. so we told her, as her husband, patrick, sat outside in their rent-a-motorhome, that after we ate our burgers, we'd show them how to get there....'there' was actually the IKEA in richmond.
so with burgers done we hopped in the elephant and made our way to the IKEA with them, vera and patrick, in close and hot pursuit.
turns out vera and patrick are celebrating their 4oth wedding anniversary by coming to canada from ireland and renting a motorhome and seeing what's what. they flew to toronto, then to calgary - where they picked-up the crusing vessel and then it was off to lake louise, banf, and finally hope where they left from today at 5 p.m....and then things went south...or actually, north. somehow while trying to get to richmond, they ended-up heading towards whistler...oops. and then somehow made their way to vera's on cornwall...where they met us....we made things right.
so we dropped 'em off at IKEA and made our way home feelin' pretty good. i still had a sore back and such, but .....
ok...enough of that...i'll give the doctor report later....

out,

g. xo

my man patrick murphy

shauna and vera murphy.

wicked jingus this neck thing....

if you called me and i didn't call you back...or something like that - it's not that i didn't want to or mean to...i hear the messages and such and then once the back starts to hurt - which is most of the time, my focus shifts to it and only it and i forget what i just told myself to remember....does that make any sense?....
i'm off today to measure up a new GP that has been recommended to me - a GP that my good pal tobe goes to and he seems to like him so...maybe i will too. as you may or may not know, my last GP, who i went to for many years over in kits, had a heart attack and is now taking it easy, so i have been without a regular doc. for a little while now...when i was at emergency the other morning the resident (i think he was....) suggested this new guy who, besides his practice across the street from st. paul's, also is an attending at st. paul's...so we'll see today if we hit it off and make plans for a second date.
i'm also going to explore some eastern medicine and see about some acupuncture. there's a woman that k-win and lisa go to up on burrard street that i'm gonna drop-in on...i've never had the pins stuck in me but at this point i'll try anything.
also, i'd like to thank everyone who has sent suggestions my way of people to see and things to try...i'm looking into all the options and going from there...

ok...

i've got shit to do that doesn't involve doctors as well - helping to get the new headquarter store in richmond going (unless he's found someone else since i've been a bit flaky because of my pain....), a couple new signs for topanga cafe, getting a new phone because telus has been fucking me for too long and it's time to say adios to them...and maybe even, in time, losing my home phone as well...i hardly ever use it...and somehow getting my new sunglasses from issy - who smuggled them in from point bob for me.....

ok.

talk later.

g. xo

here are a couple random pics form the last while....

my pal jenn was in sweden and saw this yarn/knitting store called 'garn'.

my hod looks good these days. as it always does.

in case you were wondering what the inside of woodward's looks like around now.

mr. backpain to you buddy.

ok...
so the blog has taken a bit of a backseat to my back pain....sure, sure, i cut a few lawns - but not without the help of the garbs and a load of back medicine. and i have been seen walking the streets doing errands and such, sure sure....that was me....riding my bike to raeside equipment to get some stuff for the garbs...sure, it was...then it was me later on the couch flat out wishing there was a god...or in the home traction unit wishing it didn't make my teeth hurt so much....so yes, i'm getting by, but there's a price to pay...
on a lighter note...ok..there is no lighter note right now...
i will celebrate a year with shauna tomorrow...how?..maybe a fatburger or something...maybe i'll do something classy like rent an air balloon and write something nice on it like , "i love you baby...." or maybe, just maybe, i'll just wake-up in the morning and tell her i love her and we'll figure out somewhere to go for dinner...better left to that i think....
i love you baby....can you rub some more A535 on my back? it's killlin' me....

g. xo

i need a new drug....

one that won't make me feel like puking or make me fall off to sleep...and maybe one that actually dulls the pain. this afternoon i went and got my prescription filled for my oxycodone 5 + aminophen. not as impressive as i had hoped. but better than a kick in the nuts.

wicked.

more on this as it develops...

g. xo